A Post Not About Alaska

I have to give a pre-story synopsis to explain a crazy decision I made:

Well just after Alaska (which was a draining trip with the kids in itself) Greg's Birthday came and it happened to be the day before Father's Day. I have this anxiety on family member's birthdays because I want to make them feel as special as possible on their big day and I'm always worried I'm not gonna do enough! It literally exhausts me, so to then have Father's Day the day after, and to try to make my Dad and Greg feel extremely special on that day as well, pretty much drained me. (I know it sounds selfish, but it's the truth.) I felt like I was buzzing around and catering to my sweetheart, trying not to let him lift a finger on those two days, but that's not what killed me. The day after Father's Day, Greg left at 4 in the morning off to scout camp for a week and I became a single mom for 7 days.(I know there's mom's way worse off than me and my pity party, but I'm dependent okay?!) Then Greg came home, and was asked to speak in Church the next day (more time I have to give him alone, away from the kids, so he can prepare his thoughts.) So I sat in the congregation alone with my extremely cranky children trying to keep it together, when I realize that both of my kids have huge tonsils with puss on them and I'm sitting behind a newborn baby. I take them home and Ryder has a 103.8 fever and I'll be honest I had a "Mommy Meltdown." You know the kind. Where you just can't deal with handling anything for a second longer; where your emotions overcome you and you feel like a crappy mom? So I let it out for a minute, gave the kids some medicine, drove back to church hoping to hear my husband speak (from the foyer away from anyone that might suspect my kids are sick) to try to make it to my Sharing Time I was giving and to ask Greg to take the kids home.

Now, there's more I could go on and on about, but you get the jist. Then comes Tuesday and here's story number two:

I talk my best friend into doing a "no kids and no husband trip." We called around for last minute babysitters, kissed our husbands goodbye, jumped in the car at 5 in the morning on a Wednesday and drove to San Diego... best decision of my life. We did whatever we wanted, whenever we wanted. We were free, lazy, giddy and rejuvenated. We kicked it on the beach, saw a movie in the middle of the day (more than once,) ate great food, and auditioned for American Idol. Yep, us Mormon mommies decided to be a little crazy and have some extra fun and do a huge tv-show audition. It's always been on my bucket list, I'll admit, but after having kids it was unrealistic to me. But we took advantage of the opportunity to have freedom and did something fun, for ourselves. This trip was the boost of energy I needed. It, in all honesty, shaped me into a better person, not just because I had fun but because I was able to grow spiritually and emotionally.

I'm thankful for a friend who understands me more than any other friend I have. I'm thankful for her honesty and for her belief in me. When I'm around her, I feel better about myself. I laugh so hard that I pee a little when I'm with her. I have a lot in common with her, but my favorite thing, is that we have real conversations, other than the giddiness and the Bieber Fever. So to you Charde', I'm saying thanks. Thanks for being willing to drop your life and support me in a time of need.